Finding a job sucks

Last month I started looking for a job. I have been off since July, when my company folded. It's been great to be home with the twins. But, I also know I need a job out of the house, to keep my sanity and to get me dressed in the morning. I am finding it much harder to go back to work now than I did 9 months ago when I was returning from maternity leave. The twins were only 3 months then, and not doing much. Now they are 1 and are so much more fun and we are so much more bonded. I have loved having more time to work with Drake, too. I think he is really benefiting from having me at home so much. In fact, his therapists at CCS asked me if I really had to go back to work, since they are seeing so much improvement with Drake and credit much of it to all the work we do with him at home. That comment kind of pissed me off, because I felt they were questioning my commitment to him. Yes, I have to go back to work. We live in the Bay Area, own our home. Luckily, it's taking me a while to find a job, what with the economy and the holidays. I am not in a rush. :)